codominant | @ pacifisting

@ pacifisting

[a few hasty bandaids over a profusely bleeding wound, that's probably all this is — but it stems the tide long enough for things to return to almost-normal by the time Monday rolls around. Todoroki has, as expected, recuperated from his hangover in the cool, dark, silent and blissful solitude in his room and sworn off consumption of clear Russian liquids for the foreseeable future, and seeing Midoriya in the morning is... well]

[they don't talk about it. and he doesn't want to. hopes to never, in fact, if he's allowed to have his way. there are a few times throughout the week he thinks he feels his gaze lingering on him a little too long, asking questions he doesn't have answers to (or doesn't want to), pushing his lunch around pensively as he thinks of a way to broach the topic when they're alone]

[in that, too, he gives him fewer opportunities for a while. Uraraka and Iida, oblivious as they are, make for pretty good buffers]

[...until he can't anymore, until there's blood leaking from his nose and his swollen, broken bottom lip, his back planted into the asphalt of an evacuated street by a giant's fist he wasn't fast enough to dodge, knocking the breath and the consciousness right out of him]

[when he comes to after the fight is over and Musutafu is, once again, safe, the only color he sees is — ]

Mi...dori...

[his voice is rough with pain or maybe screaming, a part of his body warm that usually isn't. is this... weight?]

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[ He knows that Todoroki isn't Bakugou and has no chance of ever reaching that point. They occupy very different places in his life and while they might have gone a little hard against each other, the context wasn't ever the same in Midoriya's mind. So many things were different with Todoroki and he still wasn't sure how to make sense of it. What mattered most ultimately is that they're still friends despite the hiccups and Todoroki's around to smack sense into him too when he needs it. ]

...You. [ Midoriya inhales slow through his nose and rests a towel covered hand against the nape of Todoroki's neck, pausing.

That, combined with inviting him in here and talking about it didn't leave a lot of room for question, but Midoriya's still cautious. He'd meant what he said earlier; Todoroki was brave about all of this. He'd end up sitting on it for weeks, trying to figure out what to do with it and then do nothing at all. At least Todoroki was brave enough to bring it up for them to stumble through. ] Alright. I think your hair's as dry as it's going to get without a blowdryer.

[ He's standing there still covered in dirt and grit and Todoroki smells like warmth and the clean, cutting scent of soap but at least he's alive, eating. ]

I didn't unless you did. [ Drawing in a fortifying breath, Midoriya squares his shoulders, and drops the towel around Todoroki's neck, holding either end. It's not fair if Todoroki's the only brave one. ] I'm sorry I don't remember more of it.

[ Like. Why. Why's a good start.

Todoroki is, after all, amazing. It's not a shock Midoriya'd want to kiss him but the opposite?Wild. ]

[with his dismissal, Todoroki practically collapses, bowing into his own body with an arm across the back of the chair and his head resting on it wearily, and it gives him proper opportunity to use the straw he's been equipped with, watching his friend through heavily lidded eyes]

[it is pure stubbornness he's still awake, but who knows how long it will last; all the same, he doesn't seem interested in rushing through this... it's probably the exhaustion that's making him so forthcoming, after all]

I thought it would ruin things between us. It's good how it is.

[and even so, the heart wants what the heart wants. how much liquor had it even taken to get him to act on it? to be willing to risk it? risk Midoriya?]

[...but he's still here]

Was it your first?

[he doesn't know why he asks. why it matters — just that it does, some impression or... or invisible mark he gets to leave on him in a similar way to what's been given to him]

[ There's the itch to do something, to get Todoroki bundled up and into bed, to make sure he's as taken care of as possible and for a moment Midoriya feels a twinge of regret; if he feels this way, his friends probably feel similarly when he's injured. ]

We wouldn't let it.

[ That, he believes firmly. They're too good of friends, too close, Todoroki means too much to him to let a relationship get in the way of that, ultimately.

Slowly, like every inch of him aches, Midoriya sits down and puts his back against the low seated chair, the only barrier between them. ]

Ah, um. My first kiss? [ Is there a right answer to this? If he says yes, will Todoroki regret it more? ] Was it yours?

[foggy and tired, he lets himself believe those words for a moment — that bonds given or built are unbreakable, that there's no limit to them, lets himself feel the warmth of them all around him like a hot bath, even when experience after experience has taught him otherwise]

[humming low, he chooses to agree with him as he shifts, slumps further, slides down the back of the chair and leans his head back. they're spine to spine without the cushion and wood between them now, and his skull falls back onto Midoriya's shoulder, two colors of hair long enough to tickle down his collarbone]

[an amused scoff — ]

Of course it was. You're the first person I've ever...

[that thought trails off: soft, low. he shouldn't finish it.]

[ Exhaustion tugs at him and he knows it must be doing worse to Todoroki. As much as he wants to bottle this moment up and keep it forever, or drag it out as long as possible, he can't. Todoroki's going to be even sorer when he wakes up if he sleeps weird and Midoriya can't let that happen.

More than that, all of Todoroki's harder edges have softened and Midoriya doesn't trust himself not to dig when he shouldn't. Instead, he pushes himself to his knees and then to his feet with a muted groan. ]

Mine, too. [ He likes Todoroki like this, Midoriya decides. Or, more accurately, he wants things to be good enough between them that he gets to see this without the side of violence, healing, and general exhaustion. ] Come on. I'm getting pretty tired and you must be even more so.

[the support falls out from under him and his head bobs before he rights it as if already caught on the peripherals of a dream, twisting slowly to watch him hovering above, a thoughtful frown on his mouth]

[mine, too — well, he could've guessed. even being near Uraraka sometimes makes him nervous, and as for the same sex, well... he doesn't think this being here has anything to do with questions like that as much as it does what Midoriya means to him, selfish and seeking]

Hey. [something he hasn't let go of, not judging from how his hand reaches up for his, lightly gripping a few fingers in his right hand — ] Take a shower. Stay.

[they're commands, but there's too much request in it for his normal confidence to filter in, looking up at him expectantly]

[ Smooth, he's so incredible, just, perfect. Midoriya's ears go red and he looks to the ceiling when he realizes he'd just sort of let him wobble but Todoroki doesn't look too pressed. Sleepily disgruntled, maybe, but he makes it, like everything else, look good. He really needs to —

take a shower. stay.

It has the unnatural ability to make Midoriya freeze in place and consider it, but he's never been good at avoiding impulsiveness with this. ]

Only if you don't mind me borrowing some clothes and maybe talking in my sleep.

[ There. He even says it steadily, confidently or just about as close to that as he can manage right then. Todoroki wouldn't have offered if he didn't want to, that much Midoriya's certain of. ]

Ah... they'll be too big.

[this, he doesn't look disgruntled about at all, his gaze instead going south in a considering sweep of that green hero costume with a gaze that's raking, a little too unchecked with exhaustion pulling down his usual stoic veil]

[as for the mental image of him in baggy clothes that belong to Todoroki himself, well — the word cute comes to mind. two hands plant, one on the table and the other on the edge of the chair, as he stands and drags his weary body up to head over to the dresser for some pajama pants; he tosses a pair blindly over his shoulder and then tugs his own on under the towel (look, modesty this time) before he pulls that off too]

[and hands it... over to Midoriya... super helpfully]

If I fall asleep, wake me up when you're done. [he'll make room for him in his bed]

I can roll them.

[ If that's the worst thing he has to worry about then that's not an issue at all. Todoroki moves to get up and Midoriya hovers like he's not sure if he ought to ask him if he wants a hand up or not. There's wanting to do it under one's own power and pushing too hard. Midoriya isn't one to speak on the latter when he's far too into the former so he keeps his hands tucked away to keep from fidgeting.

Blessedly, with Todoroki not looking, it means the fact that the pants hit Midoriya right in the face is an embarrassment witnessed by absolutely no one, so by the time he turns to hand a shirt over, he's totally cool. Absolutely. Besides, more pressing than his embarrassment at being caught unaware, there's that bubbly warmth. It feels — he doesn't even know how to describe it. Intimate, maybe, going to use his shower, sleeping in his clothes. Scrubbing a hand through his hair, he ]

I can pretty much promise you I'm going to feel way worse waking you up if you fall asleep.

[ Clothes tossed over one arm, he reaches, fiddling with the clasp at the nape of his uniform's neck, heading for the bathroom. It's 50/50 on what Todoroki does here, but Midoriya leans against the doorjamb and gives him a probably dumb smile. ]

But if you're determined to try and stay awake, I'll be fast.

Then I guess I'm staying awake. [he says as if his voice isn't as gritty as a 70-year-old chain smoker's, raw with his mere flirting with actual sleep. keep himself up... right. his phone will come in handy, which he practically wobbles to pluck out of a pocket where his hero customs is in an ugly pile on the floor]

[and then similarly wobbles to Midoriya, raising a hand towards him, and — ]

[hesitating, unsure what to do with it, where to touch...]

[he'd fought, too. Todoroki wonders where — if — it hurts, and so lowers his hand back down to his own side, red and white eyelashes low as his gaze trails down to... lips he thinks might be split under all that dirt]

[lower than before:] Be fast. You should be the last thing I see.

And people say I'm the stubborn one.

[ Midoriya's tone is gently teasing despite the exasperated little shake of his head. He'd do the exact same damn thing in Todoroki's position so he can't really blame him, but he wants to fuss and usher him into bed so he'll feel better.

Rather than arguing it any further, he watches Todoroki make his way over, absolutely not withering away inside at the way he's making his way around the room. He wants to offer to grab things, wants to help but bites it all back through sheer force of will which is for the best because he's not entirely sure he wouldn't have made a noise when Todoroki reaches out to him. The hand lowers and Midoriya's own twitches like he wants to, but...

An apology is on his lips for being so dirty and then Todoroki says that. This time there's no hiding the noise, a strangled thing that spills from his throat, cheeks, and ears burning under the dirt. ] I — You.

[ Nailed it. ] You cannot just say things like that and — it's so much, I need to shower.

[ One big stupid grin at Todoroki and then he ducks in taking the quickest possible shower while still getting himself clean. He absolutely doesn't take a moment to catalog what kind of shampoos and conditioner Todoroki uses because that's weird but the moment he reads the title he knows he's going to remember it.

The hot water aches over the cuts and bruises but comparatively, he got off easy. As soon as he's done, he dries off as quick as he can and steals mouthwash if there is any in lieu of brushing his teeth. Now, at least, he feels marginally more human and slowly eases the door back open. Maybe Todoroki will have fallen asleep. ]

[...well. the confusion will keep him up for a little while, at least — he can't? "so much"... too much?]

[it's no mystery to him that he has a tendency to be a little too intense sometimes; he's... weird, he knows, often fixates on a concept or an act of rebellion or a goal to the point of obsession. that kind of thing... can scare people away or ice them out, he's beginning to discover]

[that's the last thing he wants with Midoriya, though. and that's where the fear sets in, where the distrust in himself doesn't quite belive the words we wouldn't let it. sometimes... he just had no damn self-control, and drunk or not, it's the worst around Midoriya]

[hell, sometimes he is his self-control, the good conscience on his shoulder]

[...he shouldn't like that thought as much as he does. it's probably — unhealthy. right?]

Ah. [no such luck. he's sitting up in his futon, a blanket around his lap and still no shirt on, when the bathroom door opens, feeling even more tired now, which has less to do with the passing of time and more with his own thoughts ransacking what's left of his emotional tolerance]

[... but he's committed to this, for better or worse, and scoots closer to the wall as he pats the bedding, making room for company]

Here.

Thank you again.

[ It's only in the shower that he starts to wonder if he hadn't been clear, too flustered to think of a coherent response that wasn't asking to kiss him while he was filthy and hadn't brushed his teeth. If Todoroki is asleep, they'll handle it in the morning, he thinks, but as it turns out Todoroki is awake and — still not wearing a shirt. Alright. He's seen Todoroki shirtless countless times from the group baths during camp ages ago to the times he's burned his shirts away but.

He's totally cool and totally fine. Giving his hair one final furious scrub with a hand to try and get out any last bit of water before he comes over, Midoriya smiles again. It's not the dopey grin from before, flustered and pleased and all teeth. This one is warmer though it's ruined a moment later by a massive yawn. To the futon, then, carefully picking his way over and going to his knees. ]

Is there anything I should get before?

[ There's a slightly mortifying moment where a part of him hopes Todoroki doesn't say shirt which he violently shoves down because he honestly did mean water or a phone charger or something. ]

In.

[and we're back to blasé. there's a hand that reaches for and grabs Midoriya's wrist, giving it a tug to usher him into the blankets, lifted up tossed over both of their bodies. he'd managed to finish off the food that was brought to him in the interim of that shower, at least, the evidence of it piled up in a shelf near the bed, all things that can be dealt with later]

[the only task he wants in front of him right now is this one]

[...but there's also no protocol he knows how to rely on for this. no experiences that have come before, no manual; the closest he's even slept to another person happening only this year during their summer training in the forest, a memory soured by failure and loss]

[and he's never...]

[he's never even liked someone like this before. what the hell is he supposed to do? laying stiffly on his back at his side, inches between them, his right towards Midoriya putting him in a profile of silver and moonlight, he... stares at the ceiling... and breaks the silence after a few long moments:]

...Is it weird...?

[it's weird, isn't it...]

[ Oh. Yep, okay, chalk that up to another thing to fix. Midoriya obeys instantly, sliding himself down and tugging the covers over the both of them once he's sorted that out.

Todoroki just lays down like it's nothing, like the last few hours either didn't happen. Maybe it's just that he is really tired and finally they're both settled so he feels like he can fall asleep. Then again, if he's this worked up about it, he has a feeling that Todoroki might be too, which means stepping carefully, thinking about what he says before he says it. Heroes have to do this all the time, they have to know what to say and how to say it.

The moment Todoroki speaks, Midoriya rolls over onto his side, propping himself up to look at him. ]

I had dirt and probably some blood in my mouth. [ Dying honestly might've been easier than this, but he pushes through. Plus Ultra. ] Earlier.

[ Breathe in, attempt two. It's still rushed, but he's got that same determined face he gets when facing down a particularly complex Quirk. ] When you reached out, all I could think was that I really wanted to ask to kiss you again, but I wasso gross. If you don't want to, it's alright, but I was also going to ask if it was alright to sleep touching you. I mean I probably will already, I move around a lot you can push me away if you need—

Edited (words bad) 2018-10-18 03:15 (UTC)

[three fingers nearly slap down on Midoriya's lips, quickly halting what he suspects is going to deteriorate into the nervous rambling of a crazy and overwhelmed teenager. from the way even his eyes widen slightly, he doesn't look like he expected it of himself either, staring up at him, somewhere between mortified and deeply embarrassed]

[he only blushes to one side, the color too buried beneath his scar, but standing stark against the pales. is it fair of him to put all the impetus on Midoriya like this? to let him take full responsibility in instigating... whatever comes next?]

It's alright. [it wouldn't sit well with him; he can't just be a passive bystander to his own emotions]

[his hand slips from his mouth, away from how it's as soft as he remembers and the heat of his breath, fingertips instead trailing over freckled cheeks he can admire in the low light, where his damp hair clings to the skin near his ear... slowly, foreign, like he's learning how to do it for the first time, clumsy and naive]

[and then hooks lightly in the nape of his neck to guide him down, malleable and accepting]

It's alright.

[ He doesn't kiss the fingers that linger, but it's extraordinarily tempting to the moment he realizes that he hasn't irrevocably messed up their relationship by running his mouth. It's alright isn't necessarily the ringing endorsement for continuing past fumbling for words, though.

Alright that he wants to? Alright that he's going to move around in his sleep?

Todoroki's fingers drift away before he can decide what he's doing and he almost mourns the loss except Todoroki doesn't pull away. Fingers drift over him his face and Midoriya's stomach abruptly goes full of butterflies all over again. It's alright, Todoroki repeats and that combined with the hand at the nape of his neck brings a pleased oh to his lips. He goes down easily, doing his level best to remember not to mash his nose into Todoroki's, or to tip over and smack their heads together.

It's not the optimal position to do this in, so gingerly, he scoots closer and leans over Todoroki, adjusting his weight so he won't tip over. He means to try and deepen it, but the smile on his face is too much to contain after just a few seconds. He pulls back, turning his head just enough to press a quick kiss to the inside of Todoroki's wrist, hiding his smile there a moment. ]

Sorry, sorry, I'm just— happy. [ To say the least. He is absolutely not tearing up because of how happy he is, he's fine. His free hand comes up to cup Todoroki's own gently and then his fingers skim down, tracing the line of his arm. Kissing is vastly preferable to sticking both feet in his mouth, so he leans back down, easing his lips over Todoroki's own again. ]

[the response comes slowly, like a gardener waiting days and days for a flower to bloom, instead constricted tight within himself; he's still as he's kissed, awkwardly so, the passion from a week — two? — ago untapped in this moment that leaves him so wildly out of his element, stiff, cold, unwelcoming for all he'd welcomed it]

[he could be relieved Midoriya's the one to pull away if he didn't also mourn it. his eyes stayed open the whole time and yet he'd felt that smile more than he'd seen it, the way breath left him and fanned hot on Todoroki's lips when he almost laughed with it, euphoric and mirthful...]

[this guy... he's the sun, really, and he feels the warmth of it begin penetrating deeper]

You're apologizing for being happy? [him, of all people. who told him to stop apologizing repeatedly when he had actual things to be sorry for and yet he wouldn't even be heard. his mouth's open to say something else when Midoriya closes in on him again, and his lips fall between his own this time, more than a peck, accidentally deeper]

[oh indeed]

[something clicks into place, downright viscerally. Todoroki surges up, blossoming under the realization of it, mouth parted as he breathes in Midoriya's exhale, closing down on his bottom lip and giving it a light suck to intensify the sensation. his eyes are still open but they're at least half-lidded now, eyelashes fluttering low, and his arms close tighter around shoulders that are broader than he imagined they would be to hold]

[does he have freckles here too? he wants to strip him down and count each one, but running his tongue along the seam of his lips will just have to do for now]

[...minty]

[ After the issues over text Midoriya did one of the things he knew how best to do: he studied. He pulled up articles on his phone, went through different sites to try and figure out if one place was more helpful than the next. A part of him debated going to Uraraka about it but he'd held back, just barely. Todoroki was the kind of person who kept a great deal secret, not quite locked down but close to his chest and The Kiss was already a subject Midoriya'd made a mistake with. Bringing other people into it was the worst possible idea.

So. Research. No one really had a scientific approach to kissing that he could find. You'll know how once you kiss the other person, you'll find out what they'll like on had said. Another suggested stopping every few moments to ask but that also sounded utterly ridiculous because once he started he wasn't going to ask Todoroki for a running score here. He'd vaguely perused videos but that felt too weird and voyeuristic for him to do anything with, which means he's left with practice, after you figure it out.

Maybe, if he's not great at it, it won't matter because Todoroki won't know either, so if it's terrible they have nothing to compare it to. The only issue with that is it's...not terrible. At all. Todoroki's a long, solid line of warmth down against him, his lips are soft and he's holding Midoriya steady like he's something important. Parting his lips without a second thought Midoriya tries desperately to remember every single thing he'd ever read about kissing involving tongues and realizes none of it compares to the real thing. It's like battle; he could read a thousand books and study really hard to know everything about a battle but it's nothing without practical application.

...Probably shouldn't tell Todoroki he's thinking about battles while they're kissing and probably shouldn't be thinking about anything else while they're kissing or he'll —

He's absolutely mumbling things under his breath, into the kiss and for a long moment is mortified at himself, pulling back just enough to look down at Todoroki, pupils blown wide. He looks — incredible, of course. Too much so to look at for any amount of time because he doesn't trust himself not to say anything ridiculous so one big hand comes up and cups his cheek again, guiding him into another kiss. This time he acts rather than reacts and absolutely doesn't mumble; he nips lightly at Todoroki's bottom lip slides his tongue against Todoroki's a moment later.

Oops. He's smiling again. ]

[it's too erratic to have a rhythm with Midoriya leading like this, reflecting who he is as a person, energetic and a little chaotic; the murmuring doesn't surprise him when he feels the shapes of words against his lips, blinking heavily with a sedation both from forced healing and comfort, and instead of push him away because of it, he chases them: licks open his vowels, nips on his hard consonants, makes it a game to kiss morse code into him]

[short-lived as it is. he's breathy and flushed and his lips are swollen with attention, gaze heavy as he looks up at him, a careful stillness, wondering if this is their limit tonight and deciding that it'd be just fine if it was]

[but he's still pleased it's not; this time, he smiles too]

[hands skim down his back, over the shirt he'd given him that's entirely too long with their height difference but fills out fine with the muscle he feels under his touch, power latent but alive in this body, palpable and...]

[erotic]

[almost as much as his passion bursting out of him with untamed words and unchecked grins, how easily he finds happiness — things Todoroki can't bring himself to be jealous of but admires all the same]

[and so he rolls him, an arm hooked on his waist, pressing Midoriya's side down into the bedding. months ago, if there was still so much in him that was like it used to be, if Midoriya hadn't changed him as deeply as he had, he'd be on top of him — domineering, taking; instead, he only lays him down next to him, even and equal, both on their sides facing each other, and presses close]

[close enough to feel the hard planes of his chest against his own, for a hand on his waist to pull his hips against his, for his legs to tangle in Midoriya's, a thigh pressing up high, pulling him apart]

It's okay? [the question is a murmur of his own, hovering over lips still wet with his kiss, breath gone heavy and pulse racing]

[ It's the smile that gets him.

Todoroki smiles, of course. It's not nearly as rare or as fleeting as it used to be and Midoriya's endlessly grateful for that, for Todoroki having more reasons to smile and feeling safe enough to do so. This isn't the I find a dumb joke you made amusing smile, though. It's different, or maybe just the context is. Any time Todoroki's smiled at him, it hasn't been spread out on his sheets, lips kiss-swollen and hair soft, damp.

Midoriya takes a deep, fortifying breath and pretends like he's not coming apart at the seams. It works...adequately. Of course, as soon as he thinks he has a hold on himself Todoroki is rolling them, shifting their weight on the futon and it takes everything in him not to squawk like a lunatic until they settle. His body braces for— something, almost. Too many times practicing how to fall and get back up to not have a part of him reflexively moving, testing to see where he can brace his weight if he's pinned. It's unnecessary, as it turns out. Todoroki isn't rolling over on top of him; they're side to side and there's a leg, a thigh sliding up high and tight between his own and this time Midoriya does make a noise, a low oh of shock.

it's okay, Todoroki asks nonchalantly, like he doesn't look incredible like his thigh isn't dangerously close to where Midoriya's cock is very much starting to take an interest in what's going on here. ]

I— okay. Yes. This is— yes. [ Is what comes out instead of a more responsible we should really get some rest or an equally reasonable, and perhaps more likely sleeping in pants we came in is gross but I super don't want to get up. He'll figure it out. Right now, Midoriya hooks a leg around one of Todoroki's and tangles their feet together, using that to tug himself in closer to the bare line of his chest which he desperately wants to explore, so he slides a hand up between them, starting at his belly, tracing over it and the line of his chest with rough fingers. ] Are you okay?

[feels weird. feels good, is what he decides after a moment of Midoriya's fingers bringing up an alien, shivery feeling that he thinks probably precedes goosebumps or a winter chill half of him went immune to long ago — but not this. his body's reactive, alert, something new burning through him that isn't adrenaline or pain or the rush of a fight... it's just Midoriya]

[what Midoriya's doing to him, and the chest under his fingers vibrates low with a hum, accepting at first, and then appreciating]

Aa. [more than okay. it amazes him, really, how much this boy can make him feel, what he can change and inspire and actually give him room to act upon, the inspiration for ignition he finds himself drawn to, time and time again, with both calm and ferocity]

[he rolls forward, soft and slow, and when their hips lock — ]

[well. there's another smile this time, but it's sharper, edges that reflect the way his eyes darken with something hungrier, pupils dilated to drink in every nervous fidget, every thought that crosses his mind before he acts on it, finding it all so legible like this. could they have had this sooner? why did he push him away? he's too tired and too focused on this to remember]

I wanna touch you. [his voice is husked with that something else now, smoky and kept low like a fire to keep only them warm. no underwear — he didn't give him any, at least — so when his fingers slide beneath the elastic waistband of his pajamas he finds only skin and muscle, pressing down until fingers dig into the meat of a cheek and give his ass a firm squeeze]

[it pulls him even closer, drags him against his body, friction sparking as he basically forces Midoriya to grind his dick against the flat of his thigh — ]

[and Todoroki sighs like he's the one feeling the relief, like he'd been too pent up without it that now he can just melt into his embrace, antagonize all the scrapes and bruises along this scarred body leaving him tender; he swallows hard, and then busies his mouth again... with a kiss to his temple, mouth unoccupied, just in case he decides to speak up and tell him to stop, slow down, take it easy]

[someone should. if he gets his way, he'll be chasing all those noises Midoriya can make all night long.]

[ One for All makes him faster, stronger, more durable than before he had it. Before, Kacchan would knock him to the ground his knee would split like a bruised peach and his mother would worry.

These days, Midoriya takes a hit, rolls and keeps coming up; he doesn't know how to do anything else now that he's capable of it. That same dogged determination extends into everything in his life: his friendships, his school work, his hero work. It is, he's realizing, going to extend to this. It's one thing to know that Todoroki enjoys this as much as he does, but it's something else altogether to have Todoroki's thigh pressed tight between his legs, the way he's looking at Midoriya like he wants to eat him alive. This isn't something he can be the best at, objectively, but this something that he can learn how to be extremely good at, for Todoroki's sake. Practical application, maybe, rather than book knowledge and — he's doing it again.

I wanna touch you, Todoroki says, somehow so certain about what it is he wants, how he wants it, a million things that Midoriya's sure he'd take ages to decide how to even ask for. Todoroki just...says it. Swallowing, Midoriya leans in to brush their noses together contemplating another kiss, laughing faintly. ] You are. So much right now.

[ It's like Todoroki has this uncanny sense about how, exactly, to make Midoriya the most flustered while wringing the least sexy sounds out of him as humanly possible. The hand sliding down gives him a moment of pause; he's absolutely not wearing anything under there and Todoroki's hand just — oh, yeah, okay, he can totally be cool with that, doesn't make a startled mmh. He absolutely doesn't grind heavily onto Todoroki's thigh because he has some measure of self-control here. (He does, it's mind-meltingly great.)

Todoroki's injured. Midoriya's sure that if he looked, he'd find all the tender parts of him, the bruises and scrapes and places where Todoroki wears victory and survival in splotches of blue and red. He just got out of the hospital, it's late, and they're both exhausted, Midoriya should be the responsible one and say let's go to bed and talk about this in the morning or something else, but the problem is he doesn't want to go to bed or leave this til tomorrow. He wants to to coax more of those little sighs out of Todoroki, wants to grind himself against the muscled thigh pressed between his legs, wants to kiss him until they're both out of breath and then do it again. Truthfully, he can't recall the last time he wanted anything, anyone this badly.

This is, he figures, just another thing to give his all. Midoriya squirms until he manages to return the favor: a thigh pressed between Todoroki's own, giving him something to grind against in turn, and a scarred hand touches to the curve of his waist, the small of his back, traces up his spine until he can bury it in Todoroki's hair, using a fistful to gently tug him into another kiss, the firm certainty of it melting into eagerness and demand as Midoriya rolls their hips together, his low noise swallowed by Todoroki's lips. ]

[Midoriya isn't weak. he can't think of a single time in all that he's known him that he might've thought he was — at first too obsessed with his own problems to even notice him, and then broken open by him in a victory that ran deeper than a medal around his neck. he's pried him open with violence when he's needed it, gotten close to him with tenderness when he's needed that — and now it's some mix of the two he's never felt magnetizing them to each other, friction and heat igniting where two already-burning cores meet, just as it had in the arena]

[Midoriya, he realizes, is fully capable of pushing him off and laying him out of he wanted]

[the caution flag in his mind immolates into burning permission, a welcoming, a symbol of war; he gasps into the kiss when the favor's returned, ferocity in those hands, purpose in the attention against his now filled erection, exposed for the needy thing that he is as he rocks into him, craving more]

[he couldn't stop if he tried]

[eyes finally close with it, led by pure instinct over analysis, walls of strategy breaking down to simply feel, blindly and wholly in a way only he can make him do; the hand on his ass dips lower, tugs down pajama pants to the back of his thighs and scathes back up, palming along the line of his body. skin meets skin on their flat bellies as he surges, warm and smooth and dizzying]

[shouldn't be be above this? the son of Endeavor, enslaved to animalistic instinct, losing himself and his purpose to give into something so base, no matter how tired, how wounded, how achingly alone the touch tries to quell? not a single word his father's ever beaten into him can come close to making him reconsider this right now]

God, you feel — [praise that gets lost between their lips as he crashes like a wave upon him again, a low noise in his throat as fabric snags and drags along his groin; it's becoming a messy dance, chaotic without a beat, the push-pull of rutting against a body like this — Midoriya's body, opened up to him in a way he doesn't want to admit he's fantasized about when it's been only him in his room, out from under watchful eyes]

[there's heat on him, bleeding down onto his chest and a shoulder, making the room muggy and the places their skin touch sticky with humidity, and all he can think about is how much he likes it. then a hand sliding between their bodies, muscle concaving to let him pass, and he breaks their kiss wetly as fingers grope experimentally at where Midoriya's trapped in his pants]

[temerity growing, he pulls down the waist and wraps all of his fingers around him the way he would himself, a little clumsy, grip a little too snug; he's not ashamed to say he holds his own breath just to listen for the noise he'll undoubtedly make]

[ None of the research or reading could have hoped to prepare him for how much everything was. It's like everything is turned up to eleven until he's left feeling so much that he's not even sure how to begin to process it. When he's injured, adrenaline will kick in and leave his heart pounding but any feeling gone; this is that same heart thudding violently in his chest sensation except he feels everything all at once.

This isn't going to be enough, not really. Once won't be enough, not when there's no possible way to catalog every inch of him and he so, so desperately wants to. He could spend days learning the slope of Todoroki's shoulders, or the noises he makes if Midoriya presses his mouth here or there.

Once isn't going to be what Todoroki wants, either, though. Before, he might not have been certain about it but now, certainty is a heady sensation, almost as much as the sensation of Todoroki's hand palming the outline of where his dick is pressed against borrowed pajamas. A shocked nnnhhh, slips out from behind clenched teeth; idly grinding against the line of muscle that was Todoroki's thigh was great, but a hand was a thousand, a million times more satisfying.

Licking over his lips, he catches his breath and can't resist the urge to look down between them. He can't see shit, not with the covers hiding most of it, and like clockwork, there's a little mental note made; he wants to see as much as humanly possible next time, which means lights on. ]

I feel what?

[ He can guess at what Todoroki's going to say, but he wants to hear it, anyway, wants to commit every moment of this to memory.

Sex isn't a battle, but Midoriya realizes all too easily that he wants to respond to it like one. A noise had been wrung out of him; he wants to see what it takes to get them out of Todoroki in turn. This isn't something to be the best at, necessarily, but he certainly wasn't going to let Todoroki do all the hard work, either.

The first thing to fix is that he's not touching nearly enough of him at any given moment which means he needs to shift; the resulting shuffle isn't particularly sexy and he's hyper-aware of how warm it is under those covers but Midoriya is nothing if not stubborn. The hand he was laying on is dragged out until he's able to reach Todoroki's cheek, wanting to coax him into another series of kisses. The other hand doesn't bother with pulling pajama pants down; he slips it under elastic and angles his thigh to give himself room to circle his fingers around Todoroki's cock.

There's no lotion, there's nothing but sweat to smooth the way and abruptly Midoriya realizes it's not like his hands are soft. They're scarred, calloused, and rough; his hand goes loose a moment later. Instead of stroking the touch turns exploratory fingertips feeling out the shape of him, stroking over the wet tip and thumbing under the head lightly. He's not ashamed of the scars or roughness, but as he dares to press a kiss to Todoroki's jaw, his tone is lower, wry but not apologetic. ] Sorry. Let me know if it's too rough.

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todoroki uses fluster, it's super fucking effective

the midoriya escaped before the pokeball was even thrown.... impressive

it's not ACTUALLY running away cuz you're flustered if you come back, midoriya repeatedly tells hims

whatever helps you sleep at night, buddy...... (in his bed)

midoriya slowly combusts

oh.... bye, deku

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